Looking for numbers, relations. Take 220 and 284. They are the match of friendly numbers. They are the love, the connection, the collaboration. The divisors of 220 are 1, 2, 4, 5, 10, 11, 20, 22, 44, 55 110, and the sum is 284. The divisors of 284 are 1, 2, 4, 71, 142, and the sum is 220. Thus. 220 and 284 are friendly. A bond. I'll give you the 220, and, for me, I'll keep the 284. We are numbers. Connected. Math is life, breathing, that in which we search.
This is the quest. To be found or not found. A realism in search for a match. I'll give a locket, to feel alive, with a number. Perhaps 220. If the number given back is indeed 284, then there is a perfection, a truth.
I have no defection. I am not a defect. For my 284, I do not, never will, expect a 220. But in math I will know the possibilities. I will seek the friendly. Christ, it is about nothing but the quest. When I die, I will hold out truths, numbing, I was meant to be 284 without the 220.
I'll die by my own hand.
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